


Dead Man Walking

by ignipes



Category: House M.D., Supernatural
Genre: Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-12-31
Updated: 2006-12-31
Packaged: 2017-10-03 09:25:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ignipes/pseuds/ignipes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An unusual patient.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dead Man Walking

Mr. Huntsley died on January 27th at 10:59 a.m. Hemorrhagic dengue fever. Very unpleasant.

On March 3rd, just after 2:00 p.m., Mr. Huntsley walked into House's office wearing his finest suit and carrying a purple carnation.

"Mr. _Huntsley?_" Cameron exclaimed, because it never hurt to state the obvious when a dead man walked into the room.

Mr. Huntsley nodded at her politely. "Hello, miss," he said. His voice rattled hoarsely -- perhaps even sepulchrally -- in his throat. "How d'you do?"

"But you're--" Chase closed his mouth, opened it, closed it again.

"Dead?" Foreman sounded like he was asking the patient for confirmation.

"Quite," Mr. Huntsley agreed. He turned toward House and smiled, though the friendliness of the look was somewhat lessened by the state of his gums. "Look, I don't have much time. These two nice young men have been chasing me since the cemetery, and I imagine they'll be here any moment."

"You _can't_ be--"

House rolled his eyes and threw a pen at Chase. "Obviously he is. You act like you've never spoken to a dead man before."

"Because it's imposs--"

Ignoring Foreman's undignified squeak of protest, House leaned back in his chair and looked up at Mr. Huntsley. "I know how this works. You want something from me. Let me guess," he said, gesturing at the purple carnation, "you want to ask me to the prom?"

"Oh, this." Mr. Huntsley smiled at the carnation fondly. "No, this was on Mrs. Bevinson's grave -- she's two plots over. I thought it was pretty. I don't think she'll mind."

"Then what do you want?" House frowned suddenly. "If this is about brains, you can forget it. I'm very attached to mine, and even though these three clowns probably wouldn't miss theirs, I'd rather not have to go through another bloody carpet battle with Cuddy."

"Nothing like that," Mr. Huntsley said. His smile faded, and he took one shambling step forward, holding the carnation out toward Cameron. She stared at in horror for several seconds before gingerly accepting it, taking care not to touch his gray skin. "I'm afraid this is rather more serious. I hate to ask something so troublesome of you, but--"

A racket of shouts and running footsteps came from the hallway, accompanied by what sounded like the crash of a gurney and a chorus of breaking glass. Moments later the door to House's office burst open and two young men barged in. They charged toward Mr. Huntsley without hesitation. The taller one swept Cameron aside while the other brandished a gleaming machete, swinging down and connecting with Mr. Huntsley's neck with one smooth motion.

Mr. Huntsley's body crumpled to the floor. His head rolled to a stop underneath the whiteboard.

There were a few moments of stunned silence.

"Er, sorry about that," the taller of the young men said, releasing Cameron from his arms. "He was--"

"But you can't just--" Chase began, staring at the head.

"His _head_\--" Cameron cried, staring at the head.

"He was _dead_\--" Foreman insisted, staring at the head.

House spoke loudly enough to shut everyone else up: "I _really_ hate it when this happens."

The man with the machete looked at him and shrugged almost apologetically. "Sorry, dude," he said. "We don't do clean-up."

And just as quickly as they arrived, the young men were gone. Angry shouts from indignant nurses followed them as they raced down the hospital corridor.

"Just once," House said with a sigh, staring up at the ceiling, "just once I'd like to find out what kind of favor the dead guy wants."


End file.
